DIARY OF A MURDERER

Diary of a murderer.

Loved him,
Loved him with all my heart.
Jolly he was. Excited and passionate. Beautiful and carefree. Innocent and charming.
Playful and funny.

Watched him daily, and kept an eye on him. For his safety, I was always around him. To look after him. To hold his back in difficult times. He was a living gem never wanted to lose him.

Always knew he deserved the best. Regardless of whatever it was he always deserved the best.

His eyes couldn't see his body. He never knew that he had a body of a devil. He of unaware of it. Although devil I have always seen innocence and love in his eyes. God knows why some beautiful soul like him would emboid itself in such a scary and ugly body.

Smile decipher everything. In The little moments, we had together I could never forget that innocent, sweet and spiritful smile. It was the smile that I loved the most. It was that smile that energize my soul.

Years passed by and the devil grew up. People started to mistreat him. No one paid attention to his smile. No one paid attention to his soulful eyes. Instead, people focused on his black and scary claws. His black scalp skin. His long tail.
People started to run away from him. His friends left him. His family betrayed him. As if it was not enough people started to bully him, they started to bad-mouth him. They wanted to abandon him from society but couldn't do it.


He felt alone, even after being loved by me. I tried to make him feel better. But his eyes were not the same as before, he was changed indeed. Instead of love and innocence, his eyes reflected anger and frustration, and fear. His soul was corrupted by the false opinion of the people.

I had to find a way out. The battle was difficult but I wanted the old him back. I couldn't fight with the whole world against him. I alone cannot change their mindset and their perception towards him.
But I want him back. He was becoming the very thing that people assumed him to be. I wanted to save him. That smile was the only thing I loved the most. I couldn't afford to lose him.

Before he could suffer and change to bad anymore, I went straight to his bedroom. Made no sound. Took his head on my lap. And took out my knife and I was about to slit his throat in sleep. But I didn't had guts.

I wake him up with little slaps on the chick.
He opened his eyes and looked straight into my eyes. I didn't say a word. My eyes said everything, my eyes were shouting that you are beautiful the way you are. He understood and I could see the same old spark in his eyes.  I could see the smile I loved again. He knew it was the time of his death. He said thank you and closed his eyes.

I wanted to keep him like that forever. I wanted him to shine like that forever. I didn't want people to mistreat him and make him bad again

I slit his throat and saved him. It was an easy death. No one can tamper with his self-image anymore. The smile that I saw on his face was the last one. No one can change that smile anymore because now it does not exist.
Death was a mercy for him.
Death was a reward for him.
Living was a punishment for him.

I am happy because, in my last memory, he was smiling. Smile that I loved. The smile that gives me the desire to live.
With this memory of him being eternally happy in his last moments, I am all free in my mind. The only prison is this physical prison.

They are going to hang me for murder. Everyone thinks it is a sad thing. Stupid people. I am soon going to meet him.
I am the one who set him free. U people who are roaming outside are the real murderer. Murderer of his true self. I am the one who saved him.

And when you will hang me, you will see the happiness on my face to meet him again.